Quick Question

I have a quick question for you.

Do you share passwords with your spouse? Friends? Parents? Siblings? Boyfriend? Girlfriend?

Why or why not?

I’m just curious. I’ve heard a plethora of different reasons. But I want to know yours.

Tom and I have a password that we both use as our family password. Only the two of us know it. We use it for online banking and for different accounts we might have like amazon or netflix or the coupon sites I have joined. I also use it for my computer, for twitter, and for my blog. (So if you ever see something out of character pop up, you know Tom is in my account, messing with my stuff.)

Tom has a different password for his computer, which I also know. In fact, Tom has an entire notebook that is basically “a widow’s guide to survival.” It might sound morbid, but basically, if something should happen to Tom, I’ll have this notebook full of accounts and passwords and who to pay what, etc. He even put in our online Pizza Hut information. That’s how I know he really loves me. Because he knows how much I love pizza.

So I think he probably also has the password to his email account and facebook account in there. I should probably write mine down too. I’ve told it to him before, but only because I needed him to check something for me. I don’t know if he remembers it.

Funnily enough, Facebook and email are the two areas that seem to have people (couples, especially) in the widest variety of “trust” situations. There are some couples, like me and Tom, who don’t really care if the other has their password, but who also don’t really know each others’ passwords. Here’s why: We don’t have anything to hide, unless we’re talking about each other’s birthday or Christmas presents or planning a surprise party. But, we also don’t feel the need to check on each other. I don’t feel like I need to browse through Tom’s facebook account or email. And vice versa. If someone were to send me some message that was out of line, he’s the first person I’m going to tell. And he does the same. So that leaves us with no “why did you keep that from me?” situations. Therefore, if I need him to check my email or-for some reason-facebook for me, he can. But typically, it’s not something we really even think about.

I’ve also seen the growing trend of a couple sharing a Facebook account. I haven’t asked anyone who does this why they do it, yet. It could be accountability-knowing who is messaging their spouse and what events are going on. It could be that neither uses Facebook that often, so they just share an account. I don’t know.

Then there are the stories we have all heard where the person you’ve shared your password with has gone into your account and started to snoop around or to even mess with your account. Examples would be a mom who checks her child’s messages (to some extent, I totally get this), and the girlfriend/wife/whatever who “de-friends” a female facebook friend of her boyfriend’s/husband’s/whatever or else he does that to her.

There are SO many ways that people handle passwords. So many reasons why. What are yours?


19 thoughts on “Quick Question”

  1. We have a standard password for things that don’t matter, but I use ewallet (with a copy on my phone, computers, and ipad) that has all of my passwords for important stuff. Tami know the password to get into the password manager, but I let the password manager create passwords for important stuff. I don’t even know our bank passwords, they are random and I change them relatively frequently.

    The password manager is essentially the same as Tom’s widow’s notebook. It is not morbid, it is important in a world where so much is stored online.

    1. I have never heard of ewallet before. I bet Tom is looking it up right now. haha I like this idea because if your house burned down, all your passwords would be safe online, not burned to a crisp. Maybe we should consider switching to this.

      Yeah, I think it’s more “smart” than “morbid,” but some people don’t want to even think about preparing for death. It’s too morbid for them.

  2. I never really thought about it

    But I never get into his stuff. He doesn’t really do much on the internet anyway. If I log into his facebook its so I can rsvp for him to events otherwise nobody’d know except me that he was going.

    Don’t think he’s ever been in my stuff. Probably because he doesn’t care, and neither do I. I leave all my stuff logged in on my comp and he can come browse everything when he’s over. He can also use logmein if he wanted though we’ve only used that to solve issues on his side from here.

    Never really thought about seriously it til now actually.

    1. My computer is like that too. If there is a “remember me” check box, and I’m on my computer, I always check it. So really, anyone who could log in to my computer could access most of my online stuff. But only Tom can log in to my computer (and me, of course) without asking for the password.

      1. I’m really bad about the whole ‘logoff’ thing. Since I don’t live with anyone my computer is on and logged in 24/7 pretty much. I just like sitting down and everything’s just waiting for me. šŸ˜› There is a password, but it’s only active if I actually lock the computer or it has to shutdown or restart (which I do maybe once a month or so).

        I just thought about my work passwords. I have a lot of passwords at work to a million different things and they’re very complex and he doesn’t know a single one of them nor will he be able to guess them.

        Also, I friggen love lastpass.com. I cannot remember every password for every account I have. I must have 100+ accounts everywhere so lastpass.com makes it awesome for me to be able to access my passwords securely everywhere.

        Also I don’t have an “if i die” computer. I just have a huge life insurance plan and hope that takes care of everything.

  3. Passwords are like tooth brushes, you don’t share them.

    At least that is what the tooth brush my work gave said on it. Which I for some reason found really funny.

      1. Pretty much handled the same way you and Tom do. I won’t be providing any more details on the subject though… šŸ™‚

        1. You mean you don’t want people to know that they just have to steal one thing (a notebook, a master password to a password manager, or a single password that changes only slightly) in order to steal ALL your passwords. Why ever not? šŸ˜‰ šŸ˜‰

  4. Like you, we have a family password for shared stuff like our computer and stuff like that. Naomi has one password that she uses for everything that I know. (Despite my constant charges for her to change it and use multiple passwords) I have several.

    I use KeePass which is a password manager. Kind of like the widow’s guidebook, but she would just need one password to unlock all of them.

    We use the same PC profile, but different browsers, and I’m usually always logged into my email, facebook, and twitter accounts. All she would need to do is just click on Chrome instead of Firefox (which is what she uses), and she can peruse to her hearts content; and vice versa. I’ve given her all my passwords before in the past, but based on how she always asks, I doubt she remembers them. That, and my passwords are typically a memorized letter and number combination that would make no sense to anyone else besides me.

    Like you said, I have nothing really to hide. I don’t see the need to share email accounts because I’d probably be left crying on the floor in the fetal position after I shared Naomi’s system of handling emails and how she receives all her Facebook notifications via email *shudder.

    1. I have been surprised about how many people still share email accounts. There does not seem to be much reason for it now that anyone can get a very good free email account.

      Those that have suggested that it is a matter of integrity all barely get any email. I use my email, I file it, like Brett. Honestly, I am a little irritated when I find out that emails that I sending to guys are being all read by their wives before they get home. I am not trying to hid anything, and I do not think the guys I am sending to are hiding anything. It seems to be more of a matter of snooping than integrity.

      1. I agree. If Tom has an email he needs/wants to share with me, he’ll just forward it to me. I trust him to tell me important information or things that I deserve to know. Other than that…I don’t need to read all his emails. Nor do I really want to read them.

  5. Brian and I know each other’s password for facebook, email etc. b/c I normally have to log onto his email while he is at work to send something for him or proofread a paper he has emailed himself (he uses the same one password for everything just with a different number on the end which I can never remember). Our banking password is shared b/c we have a joint account now, and it’s the password I use for everything. What’s funny is that for Brian’s passwords that he has had to set up since we’ve started dating, he has just used my password as his b/c he thinks it’s a lot easier to remember. Also, for whoever said passwords are like toothbrushes…..sometimes we share those too…oops šŸ™‚

    1. You’re not supposed to give out my password secrets. She only tells me her passwords because she knows I will not remember them.

  6. James tells me all his passwords so that when he forgets them, I can tell him what they are. I tell him all my passwords, but then HE forgets them. I need to do what Tom did and start making lists of things like that. Maybe I’ll make that list and send it to you guys, so that someone would have it in case something happened to both of us, and we needed someone to take care of stuff for Ella.

    Then again, there’s no money in our bank account, anyway.

    1. Well, you know we would take care of Ella Belle if something were to happen to y’all! But I think we would all prefer you would not die or anything.

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